By a neck, Gronkowski clearly the best

Dan Shaughnessy

December 12, 2011|By Dan Shaughnessy, Globe Columnist

LANDOVER, Md. - Twenty-two-year-old tight end Rob Gronkowski has emerged as everybody’s favorite Patriot. Sure, that guy Brady’s OK, but Gronk is the man-child who catches everything, sheds tacklers like he’s dusting dandruff off his shoulders, and gets to the end zone more than any tight end in NFL history.

I say it’s because of his neck. You’ve never seen a guy with a neck like this. Must be tough buying shirts.

Remember Walt “No Neck’’ Williams? The Patriots have Rob “All Neck’’ Gronkowski. Watch him on those television interviews. His neck looks like somebody blew it up with a bicycle pump. Gronk’s neck is what enabled him to score a touchdown standing on his head against Kansas City - without getting hurt. His will be the most famous neck since Audrey Hepburn’s. Maybe he can do an ad for Legal Sea Foods, pushing little neck clams. Or Josh Beckett Long Necks. Wonder if Gronk knows Casablanca’s Rick Blaine, who sticks his neck out for nobody?

In the first annual “We Hate Albert Haynesworth Bowl,’’ the Patriots won another nailbiter against a bad team yesterday, beating the moribund Redskins, 34-27.

This one had some great action. The estimable Vince Wilfork scored his first career touchdown, then presented the ball to his wife, who made the trip here with about 35,000 other Patriot fans. Brady threw for 357 yards and three touchdowns, but got picked in the end zone in the fourth quarter, which led to a rare public dust-up with offensive coordinator Bill O’Brien. It wasn’t Reggie Jackson vs. Billy Martin, circa 1977, but by Patriots standards it was rare. We certainly didn’t see anything like it when NFL Films spent a year inside the Patriots locker room in 2009.

We are 13 games into this Patriots season and we know so little about the local 11. They are 10-3 and every other quarterback in the conference seems to be hurt or awful, but it’s hard to have good feelings about New England’s playoff prospects. There’s no running game, the defense lacks talent and depth, and they never put together a solid 60 minutes.

The one thing we know is that they have the new All-World tight end. Gronk. His two TD receptions yesterday gives him 15 for the season, which is two more than any tight end ever caught in a season.

Think about that. The Patriots have three games to play and Gronk already has more TD catches in a season than Mike Ditka, Kellen Winslow, Dave Casper, John Mackey, Tony Gonzalez, Mark Bavaro, Shannon Sharpe, Russ Francis, or Ozzie Newsome.

“I played with Ben Coates and Gronk is better,’’ said former Patriots quarterback Scott Zolak. “He’s a freak.’’

Gronkowski is 6 feet 6 inches, 265 pounds, and ran a 4.68 40 at the combine. He’s got soft hands. He’s a great blocker. And he’s got the neck.