Teachers and parents preach about the perils of relationships twisting into violence. Teenagers are too young, they say, to deal with serious relationships on their own, but not too young, despite what they might think, to suffer abuse and violence.
Yet more than a dozen teenagers interviewed outside shopping plazas in Braintree and Boston said that right now, in the midst of summer vacation, their thoughts turned more to relaxation than to the sober concerns of relationships gone sour.
At age 15, Tessa McKean and Sarah Mellyn have friends at Stoughton High who have been dating for a year or longer. But their friends’ relationships seem casual, they said. If those romances end, the girls predicted, neither boy nor girl would react explosively.
“It’s a little weird to be in such a serious relationship right now,’’ Mellyn said. “If you’re in high school, it’s not like you’re getting married.’’
It is not that teenagers are complete strangers to the realities of abusive relationships. When a friend of Fraser’s broke up with a longtime boyfriend months ago, the upset former boyfriend brandished a gun. But Fraser views the episode as an anomaly.
Even if their children see the issue as more theoretical than practical, parents said communication at home is key to healthy teenage relationships.
Walking out of Nordstrom’s at South Shore Plaza, Carlitos Tavares, 43, said his 13-year-old daughter, Charlene, is not yet allowed to date. He said he hopes that when Charlene is old enough to date, she will choose a boy who respects her.
Seekonk resident Christina Machado, 44, has taught her 16-year-old daughter, Jordyn, to enjoy spending time with her boyfriend of five months, but not so much that she neglects friends, family, and hobbies. Those conversations include Jordyn’s boyfriend and his parents.
“I want to make sure they’re strong enough to be their own people,’’ Machado said.
