The sheer nerve of Princess Kate

Her knees did not look dirty because she’d un-artfully applied a self-tanner. Prickly hairs were not showing. Pastiness was not an issue.

American women understandably rejoiced when the fashion gods freed us from stockings, but it turns out that the only thing worse than being forced to wear stockings in summer is not being allowed to wear stockings in summer.

I thought back to all the times I’d craved the cover nude stockings provide. But when I made the mistake of openly contemplating a pair for a business trip to New York, here’s what a friend/fashion dictator snapped: “Are you going to wear a fanny pack, too?’’

As the hose-obsessed know, the Duchess of Cambridge’s stockings - which seem to be dictated by royal protocol - have England’s knickers in a twist.

“The 29-year-old has not set a wrong foot when it comes to designer frocks,’’ the UK’s Daily Mail wrote on Tuesday, “but in almost every single picture, there is the same telltale satin sheen of sheer hosiery. While it is true that nude stockings can hide a multitude of sins, they have not been in vogue since the Eighties and the result is a somewhat ageing look, at odds with her otherwise youthful style.’’

Since the royal engagement, nude stockings are reportedly flying off the shelves in England. Would it be premature to stop shaving my legs?

Beth Teitell can be reached at bteitell@globe.com. Follow her on Twitter @BethTeitell.